Fall is Here

Fall is here.

The crispy cool morning air and the bright warm afternoons take me back to my highschool days. One in particular comes to mind. I was wearing a long dress with gold buttons. The background of the dress was black with a floral pattern, but not a bright spring floral pattern. The were muted jewel tones. I loved that dress. On my feet were incredibly uncomfortable boots and on my head was 1/2 a can of AquaNet hair spray. In my bag, or purse the size of a bag, was a jar of black ink and my fountain pen. I was feeling good. I remember wanting to preserve that moment forever. The smell, the cold morning, the bright sun, the chirping birds, the rustling of the leaves overhead, and the incredible sense of being at peace was something I wanted to pour into a glass bottle so I could set it on my shelf and immediately recall that moment.

Fall is here.

The anticipation of how much money my dad would give me for school clothes was exhilarating. I’d mall hop with my youth group leader/very good friend, Teresa. I must find the perfect hypercolor socks to go with my hypercolor t-shirt. Oh, and yes, I’ll take those striped tights and big hoop earrings. What would I wear for the first day of school? I hope nobody else has the same outfit. I had a favorite outfit my senior year. Red A-line shirt,floral leggings, black trouser socks, penny loafer type shoes, and a wide red headband to match. I wore that outfit on the first day of school…so did another girl. A really cute freshman. I couldn’t believe it!

Fall is here.

I love the smell of fresh crayola crayons, don’t you? Sharp new pencils and the coolest of all pens were the highlight of my school supplies. Oooh, and I love to organize binders. I can’t seem to KEEP them organized, but I love putting them together.

Fall is here.

Homework. Can’t say that homework is one of my fondest memories. I didn’t do a whole lot of my own homework. I loved Algebra. I loved my college prep English class, except for the fact that we had to actually share our work with our peers. I loved my friends. I loved the social aspect of high school.

Now I’m in college. I won’t be the socially savvy club leading student I was in the early 90’s. I’m wondering if I’ll even get to know my classmates. This experience will be like no other.

I’m supposed to be writing a few paragraphs about my writing process. I’m not sure how to start that since I really just write for my blog and my journal. My blog isn’t always something I put a lot of thought into. Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don’t. It really matters how I’m feeling that day and if I have anything important to say. I compile blog subjects in my mind. I don’t often get them onto paper, real or otherwise. I’d like to change that. I think that my writing process will have to change as I’m learning to write for a college course, but I’m pretty sure it will start out much like my blogs. I’ll think about it as I do dishes, fold laundry, and do other necessary tasks of my day. Then I’ll sit down and free write all I think I want to say. Then I’ll panic and wonder if I even know how to write complete sentences and proper paragraphs. I’ll try to fit a semicolon in here or there. (I now know how they’re used thanks to my WR121 instructor!)

Fall is here.

And soon I will be in love with with the red and golden leaves blanketing the streets like a welcome home carpet.

New Adventures Lie Ahead

I am a college student now. Me. The girl who didn’t continue college 14 years ago in order to be stay-at-home mom. The one who had bad grades in school, but still managed to be loved by all my teachers. I was lazy. Me. The woman who can’t seem to keep her house clean and her checkbook balanced. I started a job last month. I haven’t had a job outside my home since before I was pregnant with Christopher. I’m a homeschool mom, right? I thought I was a Jesus-loving-homeshooling-stay-at-home-photographer-mom. Things have changed, haven’t they? I still love Jesus. I still take pictures. And I’m still a mom. (I don’t think I’m supposed to start sentences with the word “and”, but I had heard somewhere that the rule for that changed.)

I’ll be taking a writing course. I love to write. I love to journal. I love to blog. I used to fantasize about writing an autobiography, but I’m waiting for something exciting to happen. I took college prep english and creative writing in high school, but that was so long ago. Now I’ll be writing for others to critique me. I want to be a better writer, sincerely I do. I’m just not so great about being criticized.

Math 070. The equivalent to highschool Algebra 1. This should be easy. Algebra comes easily to me. I’m just so thankful I don’t have to do geometry. That didn’t ever come easily to me. It hurt my brain and my dear teacher would just hand over the answer book.

Sociology- I don’t even know what to think about this class. It will be an entirely new realm for me. I think I will like it. I hope I will like it.

Then there’s the computer class that I have to take. It’s all based on Windows Vista. I have a Mac. I ordered Vista for it. I hear Windows 7 is superior to Vista, but it won’t be released until October 22. I’m thinking this class will be relatively simple. I understand computers. It’s the geek in me.

It’s the writing class that has me nervous. I know it’s silly of me, but I don’t even know what a morpheme is. Do you? Christopher has to learn and understand what it is for 8th grade language arts. I’ve never heard the word. I’m not so great at grammar. I think I’ll have to follow along in Christopher’s school, too. The definition of morpheme that I linked to up above is a much better explanation that the one his school gave him.

Here’s something shallow about me. I’m sad that I have to give up some of my tv show viewing. We don’t have cable, but I watch them online. I thought I had a short list of the ones I like, but it turns out to be several hours worth per week. I know that tv viewing isn’t so great for the brain. I’ve read the articles that tell us our brain is at the same activity level as sleeping when we watch tv.

Now, something more serious.

Some of you may know that I have been running into challenges concerning my children. Christopher is 13 now and the choices he makes and the things he allows into his brain and heart can be life altering. Do you know how scary this is for me? I didn’t know I could be so scared or so angry or so sad. However, there is hope. There is always hope. I have faith. I have Jesus. Christopher has an older man who has committed to being his mentor, accountability partner, and friend. I see good things in this friendship. All 3 of my younger kids are struggling in school. Ireland is throwing fits. Dusty is below grade level. Sage is so far below grade level we moved him from the 3rd grade to the 2nd grade even though he’s really at more of a 1st grade level. I can’t help but wonder if I’ve done something wrong. Sage had failure to thrive as an infant. I’ve been told that the #1 reason for such a thing has nothing to do with their diet, but everything to do with the amount of physical human contact babies have had. Simply put, he wasn’t held enough as an infant. That kind of thing messes with brain function. The brain can’t develop as it should. I know I didn’t hold him much. I wasn’t around him much. His birth mom wasn’t making good choices in the company she kept at that time so I didn’t visit her. All of my kids need more physical and emotional care from me. I recently read that I need to give them each a minimum of 60 minutes of 0ne-on-one time.

My washer has completely broken. I am SO sad. Seriously. True Story. However, God will work it all out for me.

Now, on a happier note.

Christopher’s ballet has resumed and rehearsals for the Nutcracker will begin soon. Bring on the crazy (read: expensive) season. Ireland starts ballet on Tuesday. Sage and Dusty start gymnastics on Tuesday. Somewhere in there I will join a local gym here in Sheridan that gives you a card key pass so I can work out whenever I want. I know you’re wondering when I’ll find the time. I’m wondering, too, but I’m not going to go all crazy about working out. I am much happier when I do get to go to the gym. I’m less stressed and much nicer to my kids.

My kids. Oh yeah, they’ll be home from their dad’s soon. I’ve gotta be ready for that.

I should be…

sleeping or cleaning or helping kids with homework or balancing the budget, but I’m not.

I’m sitting here listening to music while the kids eat hotdogs outside. I sit here remembering all the things my heart longs to write about. How incredibly blessed I am. How loved I feel by a friend who comes along me and shares in the burden of my life. How I love my job.

Ah, my job. It is a relief to go to my job. It fulfills a part of me that has been missing for many years. My heart overflows every night I work. Where do I work? I work in an assisted living facility in the memory care wing. Have I mentioned to you how much I love it? I love every part of it. I love the book lover who is thrilled when I read to him and the man who has his midnight Snicker’s ice cream snack. I love the stories and even the lack of stories. I love to love them.

I should also write about Festival of Tents. It rained. It blew. We stuck it out. While there, Ireland hit her head and needed stitches. I won’t write about those things though, until I’m ready to post pictures.

Ah, pictures. I took lots of them. That’s what I do.

School started this week. Christopher is in the 8th grade. He’ll be doing an online charter school. We met his teacher today. Dusty is in the 5th grade, Sage in the 3rd, and my sweet Ireland started Kindergarten today. I was brave. I didn’t chase her down, squeeze her, and shower her with kisses. Pictures to come next week.

And now, I must fold laundry, do dishes, direct kids, help with homework, and somehow get a nap in before I work.