I am a college student now. Me. The girl who didn’t continue college 14 years ago in order to be stay-at-home mom. The one who had bad grades in school, but still managed to be loved by all my teachers. I was lazy. Me. The woman who can’t seem to keep her house clean and her checkbook balanced. I started a job last month. I haven’t had a job outside my home since before I was pregnant with Christopher. I’m a homeschool mom, right? I thought I was a Jesus-loving-homeshooling-stay-at-home-photographer-mom. Things have changed, haven’t they? I still love Jesus. I still take pictures. And I’m still a mom. (I don’t think I’m supposed to start sentences with the word “and”, but I had heard somewhere that the rule for that changed.)

I’ll be taking a writing course. I love to write. I love to journal. I love to blog. I used to fantasize about writing an autobiography, but I’m waiting for something exciting to happen. I took college prep english and creative writing in high school, but that was so long ago. Now I’ll be writing for others to critique me. I want to be a better writer, sincerely I do. I’m just not so great about being criticized.

Math 070. The equivalent to highschool Algebra 1. This should be easy. Algebra comes easily to me. I’m just so thankful I don’t have to do geometry. That didn’t ever come easily to me. It hurt my brain and my dear teacher would just hand over the answer book.

Sociology- I don’t even know what to think about this class. It will be an entirely new realm for me. I think I will like it. I hope I will like it.

Then there’s the computer class that I have to take. It’s all based on Windows Vista. I have a Mac. I ordered Vista for it. I hear Windows 7 is superior to Vista, but it won’t be released until October 22. I’m thinking this class will be relatively simple. I understand computers. It’s the geek in me.

It’s the writing class that has me nervous. I know it’s silly of me, but I don’t even know what a morpheme is. Do you? Christopher has to learn and understand what it is for 8th grade language arts. I’ve never heard the word. I’m not so great at grammar. I think I’ll have to follow along in Christopher’s school, too. The definition of morpheme that I linked to up above is a much better explanation that the one his school gave him.

Here’s something shallow about me. I’m sad that I have to give up some of my tv show viewing. We don’t have cable, but I watch them online. I thought I had a short list of the ones I like, but it turns out to be several hours worth per week. I know that tv viewing isn’t so great for the brain. I’ve read the articles that tell us our brain is at the same activity level as sleeping when we watch tv.

Now, something more serious.

Some of you may know that I have been running into challenges concerning my children. Christopher is 13 now and the choices he makes and the things he allows into his brain and heart can be life altering. Do you know how scary this is for me? I didn’t know I could be so scared or so angry or so sad. However, there is hope. There is always hope. I have faith. I have Jesus. Christopher has an older man who has committed to being his mentor, accountability partner, and friend. I see good things in this friendship. All 3 of my younger kids are struggling in school. Ireland is throwing fits. Dusty is below grade level. Sage is so far below grade level we moved him from the 3rd grade to the 2nd grade even though he’s really at more of a 1st grade level. I can’t help but wonder if I’ve done something wrong. Sage had failure to thrive as an infant. I’ve been told that the #1 reason for such a thing has nothing to do with their diet, but everything to do with the amount of physical human contact babies have had. Simply put, he wasn’t held enough as an infant. That kind of thing messes with brain function. The brain can’t develop as it should. I know I didn’t hold him much. I wasn’t around him much. His birth mom wasn’t making good choices in the company she kept at that time so I didn’t visit her. All of my kids need more physical and emotional care from me. I recently read that I need to give them each a minimum of 60 minutes of 0ne-on-one time.

My washer has completely broken. I am SO sad. Seriously. True Story. However, God will work it all out for me.

Now, on a happier note.

Christopher’s ballet has resumed and rehearsals for the Nutcracker will begin soon. Bring on the crazy (read: expensive) season. Ireland starts ballet on Tuesday. Sage and Dusty start gymnastics on Tuesday. Somewhere in there I will join a local gym here in Sheridan that gives you a card key pass so I can work out whenever I want. I know you’re wondering when I’ll find the time. I’m wondering, too, but I’m not going to go all crazy about working out. I am much happier when I do get to go to the gym. I’m less stressed and much nicer to my kids.

My kids. Oh yeah, they’ll be home from their dad’s soon. I’ve gotta be ready for that.