It’s only day 4 and I almost forgot to post.

I have a confession. I haven’t done much reflecting today. I stayed up WAY too late last night. Didn’t get up for quiet time this morning. I hurt my back somehow and today I’ve been in more pain so really I’ve just been managing.

I don’t want to just manage, even while in pain. I wrote about Sara the other day. She didn’t just manage or survive. She walked in joy even when she could no longer walk.

Well, I may not have been more joyful today, but I didn’t have any blow ups. My little boy did, but I was able to remain calm. I was calm when my passively aggressive kid was disrespectful. I was calm when the littlest one still ate the cheese and banana that I told her NOT to eat. [She repented within about 10 minutes and we talked about it. I love that repentant heart!] I was calm when my pre-teen tells me that I let her wear that shirt all the time when in fact I tell her NOT to wear that again. Why isn’t it off to Goodwill already? I calmly taught a child a little bit about using photoshop. [I can’t remember how I ever learned to use it!]

I did whine a little about my back and really, I am whining again.

Managing.

I am not a good manager of my home. I’m not terrible, either. I’m just not where I want to be. However, I did quickly find a paper that I needed to turn in. I had placed in my home management binder, or my brain book as I like to call it. I did forget to take it into town with me! Grrr. I am slowly sifting through the paper in my life and figuring out how to organize it. Much of it ends up in the trash. I have several files of things I’ve kept as mementos over the years. I will eventually go through all of those, too.

It seems to me that I have been praying that I would be a better manager of my time and money. I wonder if I’ve improved over the past 16 years? I certainly hope so!

Oh, weight management. Ok. I don’t think I’m going to talk about that one right now. Although, I will say that I have been reading a book called, “Love to Eat, Hate to Eat”. I haven’t been too impressed by it so far, but today I read a chapter about DISCIPLINED Eating. Each of the capital letters is part of an acronym. I don’t remember all of them, but I do remember that one of them was about a certain food being an entry way into sin. For instance, eating a brownie isn’t sin, but will it lead me to wanting the whole pan? That gluttony and lack of self-control is sin. That brought to mind other areas like shopping or sex. Will one small thing lead to a big thing?

I will ponder on this some more and perhaps memorize the acronym so I can think about it before I delve into my next bout of binging.

My back is crying out for some ibuprofen and the heat pad now.

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