For years this has been an uncomfortable question to answer. I used to proudly say, “I’m a stay-at-home wife and mom of 4.” Sometimes I’d say something like “domestic engineer” or something more biblical like “keeper of my home”. Then, I became a single mom and I didn’t feel so proud to say that I’m at home with my kids and not working. I felt shame. I was so ashamed that I couldn’t keep my husband. I might be a keeper of my home, but I wasn’t a keeper of my husband.
So now I took on a new title:
Single mom with 4 kids. Then after a year or so, I went on foodstamps. That made me a single mom on welfare. Ugh and double ugh.
Every time I messed up I gave myself a new title. What do I do? I mess up. I do dumb stuff. That makes me a dummy.
Then I moved on to saying things like, “I parent my kids with special emotional needs because they came to me broken and another one has been through the ringer.”
But mostly I thought things like:
- I mess up my kids.
- I’m a sub-par photographer.
- I’m a fake.
Now, I have a different answer. Go ahead, ask me, I dare you?
So Dar, what do you do?
I am building a legacy of dream achievers.
What does that mean, exactly? Well, several years ago I was told to by someone to not tell her son to dream because he’s just going to be disappointed. Wow! Really? It took me years to realize that while I recognized that concept was not truth, I still lived there. I’d have these ideas, but always shoot them down for one reason or another. No longer will I claim that. All things are possible with God. That’s in the Bible, people, so it’s truth. ALL. What does that mean, exactly? Does that mean I can climb Mount Everest? Maybe not for me, but maybe it is for you. Seek first the Kingdom of God. Maybe he’ll start to spur you to travel the world with your children. If so, do you just wait around and hope it will magically happen? Or do you start planning? Yes, the Lord directs our paths while we plan our little lives away, but I think we can get to where He has for us a whole lot quicker if we just start moving.
My children are amazing. They are fighters and survivors, they have skills that astound you. One of my kids can walk into a room and personally make contact with every person. Another one is skilled at getting the attention she wants while some of the people around her are so charmed by her. I have a sweet boy who is growing up and learning to talk to me about tough and uncomfortable things. Maybe one of my kids will put their skills to use in a courtroom or be an advocate for the forgotten people. Perhaps she’ll be the next Amy Carmichael. My children will be have the skill and hopefully the compassion to look someone in the eye and say, “I get it. We’re all hot messes up in here, but God loves me and He loves you, too. He has plans for good and not evil for you. Would you like to get to know Him?” I have creative kids and kids who love to read. Others prefer to listen to a story, while others pretend they don’t like either.
I am inspiring not only my children, but others, to carry on when they think they can’t go any further. Christopher, my son, once said to me that he admired me because even when things are hard, I keep going. Sometimes I’ve felt like it’s because I don’t have a choice, but that’s not true. I always have a choice. You always have a choice. That’s perhaps one of the most powerful gifts I’m giving my children, a Choice. They are learning about Jesus and the plan that the Father has for them, but they may not choose that. They are not powerless to follow the path of others before them. They’ve had it tough. They’ve been neglected and bounced around, then came to my home. They are blessed. They don’t even have a clue how blessed they are by not bouncing around in the foster care system. I am teaching them to not take that victim role. Yep , crappy stuff happens, but guess what? That doesn’t make you any different than anyone else. We all have something painful.
Hey, look to this Jesus guy. He’s the real deal. He’s better than Disneyland. Listen up, He’ll give you dreams and desires and then get this, if you choose to follow Him, those things will actually happen. Renew those minds, be transformed. Hang with people who you want to be like. You want to be amazing, then do it!
Watch out world, my little Taylor Tribe is gonna learn to dream, then they’re going to believe it, and finally achieve it.
I learned that from Mary Kay Ash, “If you dream it and believe it, you can achieve it.”
P.S. What are you doing today to move you toward you goal, vision, dream? I’m going to be early so I can rise early. [edit – I wrote this last night and I did wake up early, but then I fell back to sleep.]